The Story of Sub Dome and My Beam Radiation Treatment

by on March 21, 2024 at 9:39 pm
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The Story of Sub Dome and My Beam Radiation Treatment

I’m done! Last week was crazy! Santosha Ma, on the way out after her visit to check up on me, said that the final week of beam radiation therapy, the week where the skin begins to split, crack and ooze, was my “sub dome.”  I chuckled with her as I recall what a psyche-out the sub dome portion of half dome was when we climbed it together, a group of us.  That metaphor was so critical in my keeping a certain perspective.  Yes, there were only five days left, but there were difficult days.

Red awaits for the crew 2

We all did the hike, and were fine, despite my having drank up all my water, but it was super pretty, and the sense of adventure was high, never mind that it took half the day to reach the cables that would ultimately though tumultuously bring us to the top of half dome to take in the marvelous view! We made it! We sat and gazed at the horizon, and ate our lunches peering down the sheer heights.

Then it hit me. We have to get all the way back, the last half of the day, the one where your enthusiasm have gone. That was a great time still, us pounding the earth as we tiredly walked back to the trail head and the parking lot.

Then there was the drive home, James, our designated driver, swaying in tiredness.  Aching all over, we sorta slept, but mainly… ached.

 

My skin from the day after day exposure to photons, 27 days at that point, gave me a kind of sun tan that looked like Fred Flintstone’s five o’clock shadow beneath the chin, all the way to my ears and beneath the jaws. No hair existed on my chin or neck, only the peach fuzz of a silly mustache and sideburns. My skin burned, like a bad sunburn. Not too bad yet. With only three days left, I thought for sure I’d slide on through. Was the nausea not enough? The fatigue, rough sleep, the sore throat, the metallic taste in my mouth accompanied by thick nasty stringy saliva? Surely I could get a pass. Right?

The doctor shook her head ‘no.’ as I sat in observation after session 28.

“It’s going to get worse. Do you want to take a break?” She asked. By her plan I’d enjoy the weekend and resume midweek instead of Monday. I sighed.

These last three days were what she referred to as ‘booster,’ days, where they focus the area but ratchet up the intensity. I just had gone through one.

“No, let’s just push on through it.” I said.

Over the weekend, just prior to day 29 the skin began to peel steadily, just as she said, and then it cracked, and then… it oozed where wounds gaped like a burn victim’s.  My sub dome.

Luckily the weekend separated day 30 from 31.  I used the prescribed cream and wrapped my neck in gauze and a scarf. I hunkered down and did tons of A.I. art and trailers to keep myself distracted and on Monday I was determined to finish up and go to work. Stupid… maybe. Santosha Ma and Prem rode in with me for my… eh…  graduation day.  I worried that my weeks-baking scent would offend, but she only joked and encouraged me. “Last day!” Santosha Ma said. Prem followed us in their Lexus, since I was so headstrong about going to work.

I laid down for 15 the minutes, was up and found myself in the hallway where they had me ring a bell to sound off that I was done! Santosha Ma took some video of it. Boy… I look so tired! Who0000o!!!! Yeeeeeeee!  Sub dome, done!  Right?

At work, my colleagues greeted me, some shocked by the site of my neck. I worked at least half the day. It was too tough though I was excited to be through it. All that need happen was the skin’s healing which was tough but not impossible. Then I started to feel… bad. I had to leave, as pain mounted along with the dizziness that typically followed mid-morning. I woke up the next day and worried that maybe in trying to dry out the wounds allowed for infection.

Sure.

Probably

Maybe?

I called in, and thought a day of rest would get me through. Then I called in Wednesday, now concerned as I ached all over and had no energy suddenly. I broke out a home test, read it, and wept.  I had Covid. Sigh.

Sub dome. A few days behind me, and still a mix of feeling good and well struggling. Today I feel good as the several inches of feeling space that the radiation took from me has been returned to me, the spaces of my own sanity in no longer being near the deeper edges of my pain/discomfort threshold.

“What sucks about this,” I answered Santosha Ma, when she asked what was worse this or surgery, “Is the length of time, five long weeks of a very difficult pattern you don’t escape through anesthesia or even sleep.” I remember how I refused to even consider doing it. After back to back surgerys since 2019 though, I knew I had to just hunker down and try this. So anyway. We made it. Each day I feel a little better even with the flu bonus.

It’s all just a story, eh?

“Well, you’re through it Eddie, congratulations.” Santosha Ma said in the parking lot that morning of day 31. She was happy for me. Just days before they both gifted me a few pick me ups, on being an old favorite video game from the legacy console I broke down and bought to help keep me engaged/distracted, depending how you’d like to think of it.

I hugged her and Prem. Another story behind us as the truth teller pulls on the oars and tries to keep his enlightenment safe as houses on the seas of experience.

enjoy the images!